Ramona’s Lessons in Parenthood

When I was a young child, I read a lot.  I loved to escape to the dumbwaiter with “Harriet the Spy,”  a book I re-read over and over.  And I understood Ramona, because I think I, too was a pest.   I spent summer afternoons and countless evenings reading, with my mother or by myself.  I remember being in school, anxious to leave to get back to whatever book captivated me at that time.  Saturday afternoons spent at the Public Library are precious memories.  I affectionately remember the smell of the library, old books, and the crinkly plastic covers on the books to protect them.

When in high school, however, I took little pleasure in reading.  It seemed so much of my reading was forced on me.  I might now enjoy great British or American authors but in school, it was stilted and boring.  I remember dreading American Authors class and “The Red Badge of Courage,”  by Stephen Crane, described as one of the most influential books in American literature; a book my 8 year old son might grow to love.  But at the time, that and “The Scarlett Letter” by Nathaniel Hawthorne, were simply dreadful.  Which, by the way is interesting because I think “The Scarlett Letter” is one of the most intriguing books about Puritanism and the psychology of sin. Somehow, I don’t think it was quite presented to me that way in high school.  I think my dislike of literature grew because of the way I was expected to learn about these works.  It was not for the enjoyment at all. Continue reading

Cosmic Messages

In late October 2009, my husband, Will, and I were told that Clare, our 5 year old required open-heart surgery to correct a congenital heart defect.  We found this out two days after I found out I was pregnant.  I was very afraid this was some cosmic message.  Frankly, was this new baby replacing Clare?  It was difficult to steer away from that thinking, though as a dear friend told me, “It doesn’t work that way.”

In the beginning, I was very excited and began to grow rather quickly, making it difficult to hide this new fact.  I was happily self-conscious.  Clare’s surgery was scheduled for some four months away, which, at the time, seemed an eternity.  I would be nearly six months pregnant at the time.  I had a lot of stress come my way after finding out about my pregnancy, and Clare. Continue reading

Money lessons

moneylessonsFinancial stress is the absolute worst for families.  Right around the time that my husband and I found out that our five-year old daughter, Clare, would have to have open-heart surgery to correct a congenital heart defect (a medical determination we hoped we wouldn’t receive and did not thoroughly expect), we started experiencing some serious financial strain. Despite having a full work load, I had had no income for over 4 months and the economy was in turmoil.  I heard stories weekly of friends, and friends of friends who seemed “well-off” losing their homes. Continue reading

Everybody knows you’re guilty

When my son, Robert, was 7, we were all sitting at the dining room table for dinner.  We may have been talking about our days, including mine as a criminal defense lawyer.  He said “here’s a police officer,”  and with an index finger pointed right at me, looking straight in my eyes he said “Everybody knows you’re guilty!”  at which we all laughed.  I mean, it was hilarious.  And the kid now has a strong sense of justice.

So, a year and a half after Robert’s imitation of a police officer, after seeing, on the back of his homework his bubble lettering reading “Latin Kings are awesome” or something like that, my heart sank a little. Continue reading